What the massage
changed in them.
These testimonials arrived after the sessions. Some are poems, others letters, others still simple words sent the same evening. They speak of the body, of emotion, of what opened. I share them here with their permission, with gratitude. First names have been changed.
Elisabeth, 50 years old, Paris
It has now been two months since I received my first tantric massage. It was an unforgettable experience. Thank you so much, Bruno!
This massage allowed me to reconnect with my body. During the massage, I felt a deep happiness and an inner fullness. Bruno, you are an exceptional and caring masseur. The words that come to me to describe this massage are gentleness, slowness and safety, connection and love.
After this massage I felt lighter, as if my body could move in every direction. I feel that a transformation is underway, like a chrysalis becoming a butterfly.
It was a wonderful moment for me.
Thank you Bruno, for all the love you gave me.
Clément sent me this feedback after the massage:
« Thank you. I have never felt such purity in my relationship with another. We could not speak, simply feel each other, touch with the tips of our fingers, hold each other, caress each other… as if our bodies responded only to instinct, something obvious and natural. Your sensitivity is overwhelming. »
That a man could write this moves me. I want here to pay tribute to men who embody their sensitivity, who externalise it. Who accept it as an essential dimension of themselves. Who place it at the centre of the game. Of the Self.
A world built, established, on this side of sensitivity laid bare would simply have a different flavour, a different appeal — because connected to the Living… and not dissociated from it. Let us dare to use the words « purity », « natural », « sensitivity » as structuring, major, essential words. The world will be more beautiful.
It will soon be two weeks since this massage, which changed the current of my energy and my vibration…
It is a singular and precious experience that I keep in the casket of my heart. It allowed me to reconnect with my life force. I found again a certain savour in existing.
I wonder how to reconnect with those moments… of grace, of ecstasy… that sacred trace. I hold the memory of this precious moment: a jewel!
I feel that a new path has opened, I carry the imprint of the traces and the rediscovered joy of being alive. Thank you infinitely for this moment of grace.
I loved this tantric massage — the first I had ever received. I felt safe, though already on the phone I had been greatly reassured. It is no small thing, after all, to undress in front of a stranger.
The conversation before the massage shed light on my needs, desires and small changes I would like to experience in my personal sexuality and in that of my couple. The massage session brought me peace and a slower pace of living — I who am rather fast. I felt very at ease in every phase of this massage. And knowing my body and its landscape better is essential at this stage.
The connection with you felt easy, as if this encounter flowed naturally. I want to deepen this bond with my body, with my intimacy — I want to give it time. For this, your help will be precious, I believe.
I had not had many expectations when I tried it. Today I know that I want to explore this territory: it is the territory of my life.
Dear Bruno,
Just to thank you again for the long time you offered me with such generosity. It did me a world of good to feel loved and caressed with such kindness, without sexual expectation, by a man. Liberating, strengthening and balancing. Thank you from the bottom of my heart and have a beautiful week. 🙏🌈
Bruno,
I will try to put into words what I felt yesterday during the session. Yes, I lived through such an intense moment. Thank you, thank you Bruno.
In this space where I let myself be open to the experience, I slid toward the shadow.
I was seized, astonished, and I saw this darkness: a foot, myself on the ground and my hand to protect myself (Claire saw resurface from the depths of her memory a gesture of her mother, and she abruptly pushed away my hand / Bruno’s note). When your voice said my name, I came back to myself. You asked me why I had pushed that hand away. I spoke, but I also said — I remember these words very well — it was good. Yes, it was good because it was the right moment, here in this space of total trust, filled with tranquillity, with slowness. Because I was able to visualise this thing lying in wait: thanks to the slow, the gentle, this trust between the masseur and me, it was brought to light. I needed all that time… And yet I am certain you had already touched that place before. But it was too deeply locked within me.
And then: total opening, like a rose about to bloom. A perfect accord between that hand and my buried interior. I knew, certainly, that in that moment I could draw from it light, harmony, peace.
My body sensed it.
Thank you, because that place, with that hand — thanks to your experience — was magnified as I had wished. From the darkness, something beautiful was made.
I want no bitterness, no reproach toward anyone. On the contrary, I want to offer Grace.
I feel like a mature woman — but truly a beautiful woman, in harmony and full of life.
This crack will always be in me — I know it — but it is light as silk, and gives me all the more desire to move toward joy, toward fullness. Gratitude.
This sentence is for you, the tantric masseur: the importance of words in therapy — but that is not everything. The language of the body reveals so much of the intimate.
THANK YOU
Thank you for last Sunday’s session.
Thank you for that bubble of trust and kindness.
Thank you for the liberation of my voice.
Thank you for that deep connection between us.
Thank you for your touches and amplitudes of contact that I had never known before, which began to fill a vital lack, which began to free the expression of my body.
Thank you for your words about my body, which did me a world of good, which boosted my confidence and allowed me to begin to move beyond certain fears.
Thank you for your advice and suggestions: taking care of myself without putting myself in danger (freeing myself from certain limits, yes — doing anything reckless, no), I still have beautiful years ahead of me (and I may as well begin now, even if I still have fears), the photograph (Project: An Anonymous Nude in the Living Room — Idan Wizen, photographer) for my relationship with my body.
In short, that Sunday will no doubt remain for a long time in my memory as a key event in my life.
I spent the whole of Sunday with a very pleasant feeling of fullness and serenity. It lifted my spirits and allowed me to begin other steps and actions.
I was already kind to myself — now I am allowing myself to love myself and truly attend to my needs. To be proud of my body, which I filmed and photographed at the start of the week to see it differently from how I see it in a mirror, and to love it. To have confidence in the future, and to begin again, these past few days, to dream of encounters and a different life. To be resolved to let my vital energy express itself more freely — soon to radiate like Bowie — and to start moving again.
In short: many new beginnings, and the conviction that I have much more yet to discover in future sessions.
THANK YOU, and see you soon.
Two months after this massage, and following his participation in a men’s retreat in the meantime, Paul sent a long email — in which he describes his retreat experience in great detail, bearing witness to the rich inner journey he has already undertaken toward himself, and by extension toward others — which he concludes as follows:
My testimonial after the first massage was not an exaggeration: it truly was a trigger, a breach in my mind, a turning point in my life. I am extremely grateful to you for it.
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! You can be proud of the good you do for those you massage.
I discovered tantric massage with Bruno. I had never experienced it before. Never would I have imagined being able to let go so completely. I was going through a period when the agitation of my mind was pulling in every direction. I experienced this massage as a meditation in which I was connected to all my bodily sensations. I would never have believed myself capable of surrendering completely in a boundless trust that allowed me to live a journey of deep sensations — of connection with myself, but also with something greater than me, something vaster. It is truly something, this — very powerful. Bruno’s hands on my body, his voice, the music. I lived an opening to the world, a state of wellbeing, of sensuality, of fullness, of gratitude that I wish for every person to know one day. And also a return to the maternal womb that moved me to tears, for it awakened in me a visceral need to be enveloped, surrounded. Tears that Bruno welcomed with kindness, and for which I thank him warmly. At certain moments, I had the sensation that my body was an extension of his — when my hand held his or slid along his arm and we formed no more than a single entity. A moment of authenticity, of truth, freed from the fear of moving forward without a mask, without make-up, vulnerable, open to risk… without risk, thanks to the safe framework that is a truly authentic tantric massage. A few days later, I can say that this experience continues. It is a feeling of calm, a more developed capacity to live the present moment of each instant — limiting the unfortunate habit of the mind to return endlessly to past events or to project imaginary futures that do not exist. And that is truly what I needed in this period so stressful for me.
Bruno’s tantric massage takes place in an atmosphere of respect and the greatest gentleness.
For my part, I greatly appreciated being able to talk and exchange with him before the massage. It allowed me to settle, to make a transition between the « fury of the city » and the gentleness of the massage. I had time to decompress and to begin the massage in a pleasant way.
The beginning of the massage I experienced as feathers on my body. Then, little by little, his hands became firmer, more present — but always in gentleness. I had the impression that through his touch, Bruno wanted to release all the fears and all the traumas from my body.
He took the time to explain what he was doing.
At the end of the massage, there too, being able to take time to talk allowed me to come out of the massage gently.
Nothing is imposed, everything is offered.
Through this massage, Bruno allowed me to know myself better and to listen more closely to my body.
A very powerful experience for me.
Lea, 37 years old, Paris
This time with you was a gift. A chosen suspension I offered myself, to go a little deeper into my own depths. With you, with myself, thanks to you and thanks to myself. Thank you.
I lived a journey — gentle, reassuring, imperious — in the realm of the obvious and the tender.
Thank you for this time of rivers, for this time of stars and tides. I received on my body the small waves of the sea that washed me clean, thanks to your hands and your right presence. And your hands came to reassure me. They said of course, they said yes, they said always. Of course I was loveable — since I was myself, with the shape of my body, with the tears in my eyes and with the smiles.
Massage a few days ago. No words yet — I have not had much space to write. The experience remains very, very present in me, and my body is greatly activated by this space of liberation that we shared. I feel very energised, and at the same time with a kind of inner tension — a tension linked to this awakened sexual energy. So all is well, yes, very well! I tell myself I would like to renew the experience, to explore further.
Your accompaniment and your gentle, powerful presence were true gifts to the woman I am — who dares once again to show herself. See you soon! Coralie
It was fantastic! I spent a wonderful moment in Bruno’s company. A bubble suspended outside of time, where I was a queen. A warm welcome, from a professional who listens, with the hands of a magician. Thank you again — it is a small casket of happiness and wellbeing to which I will not hesitate to return with pleasure.
It is with pleasure that I share my testimonial about your massage: a moment of pure delight! With gentleness and supple firmness, you brought me relaxation and reconnection with every part of my body. In total trust, I was able to let go and appreciate the wellbeing you gave me.
A short testimonial in return: the gift of a complete massage, to let your energy penetrate me and dialogue with mine. I had been neglected, and you came to give me: Energy, with tact and sensitivity. I felt your hands charged with love at every touch, and in the silences too. Like a healer — and I was confident in your hands.
You began with the lower back and stayed there a long time. I had the impression of being a bee, with that narrow passage between the thorax and the abdomen. You polished that part of the spine that connects the upper to the lower, as if I had told you that I was in pain there, here, now, lying before you.
Once the lower back was tended to, the caresses of the back… unlike ordinary massages, here it is caresses over the entire body. And one is never caressed like this. It is good. My whole body was smiling. When you massaged my pelvis, my belly, I no longer knew what position I was in. I had the impression of being on my side — yet I was never on my side. I had lost all sense of orientation, the impression of being in water. You massaged me and I felt the void of the aborted child, and I felt my last pregnancy, when my partner had abandoned me. So many real pains lodged in my belly… and I had not known where they were.
You pressed my belly and I had the impression that you knew. You were circulating the energy, dissolving everything with love. I had the impression of growing younger in my belly. It is an important experience and I do not yet have enough distance from it — but, beyond the happiness I felt throughout the massage, I sense something moving, changed, or perhaps healed in me.
Here is my testimonial: This massage was for me a moment of reconnection with my body and my energy. I particularly appreciated the quality of Bruno’s touch: firm, broad, delicate, attentive, sensitive and deep. I am very eager to explore further along this new path.
Bruno put me at ease by explaining the philosophy and the flow of the massage. The massage took place in a spirit of kindness and attentiveness — I was truly able to appreciate this moment of exchange and sharing. Sharing is for me at the heart of this experience, in which the masseur allowed me to connect with my own body and to feel the sense of existing — bodily and emotionally.
Dear Bruno, a short — or rather GREAT — return from yesterday’s massage: little sleep, but of an incredible depth and wellbeing. I woke in the night; I remember a yellow dead leaf flying away… just awake enough to say to myself: Oh, the massage has already happened!
You asked me for a testimonial: Since this morning I feel light. My lungs open wide, and when my vocal cords are active, they make my chest, my heart and below vibrate broadly — and all the way up into my head. Thank you for your hands so full of energy, of love, of gentleness, of kindness, and also of power and reassuring, sustaining strength. Thank you for the time to speak, during which you made me truly understand my freedom — so little used until now.
I still have a long way to go — but what a magnificent path it is, this path of pleasure, of love, of LIFE!
It has now been a month since you gave me this massage — here is my testimonial: despite the time that has passed, an unforgettable imprint of that shared time remains with me. Feeling your hands settle delicately on my skin, graze it, then enter into more intimate contact through the oil — feeling your hands awaken the cells of my body, every part of it, one by one, on the surface and then in the depths. For the heart, the lungs, the muscles of my arms and legs, then those of my whole body, vibrate at the same rhythm, in a continuous breath that never ceases to expand.
Then I know not by what magic your hands stop, listen — my body writhes with pleasure, an indescribable internal quiver. Then the movement of your hands becomes slow, very slow, ultra slow — and there, I enter a new space where time no longer exists, my body no longer exists, or rather, I reconnect with the great WHOLE, where all is one and one is all. Difficult to transcribe in human words — for it seems to me superhuman.
There is no longer space, no longer time — and yet, all space and all time. I no longer know where the boundaries of my body lie, and this moment so unique remains engraved deep within me. And I love to reconnect with it often — beyond your hands, beyond the massage, beyond our encounter… How good it is.
My encounter with Bruno Deck, through my closest friends, was an opportunity to discover an art I knew absolutely nothing about — one that brought me tranquillity in this world of stress, individualism and anger. It was a wonderful encounter with a time of the spirit, of humanity. At first, I was trying not to think, to escape from the grip of my groundless anxiety. Something rather pathological in me that can daily trigger respiratory stress, a shutting down of the machinery of reason. Breath short, mind riveted on anxiety, my body tenses and I spend my days living with it — not to mention the nights.
First of all, it was easy to feel at ease — in the space, with you, and in relation to our nakedness. An effect of your sincerity and of the Love you put into setting up your room, and that you put into what you do — at least as much. The choice of oil you use contributed greatly to my trust and to my letting go. I was no longer aware of time, and I was without inhibition or restraint — myself, with this body of mine that I do not much like, but which this session led me to cherish, to stop hiding.
I loved the alternation of contact between your hands and your body, rapid movements and slower ones, firm pressure and light grazes. I loved the gentleness of the gestures, the sensations of cocooning at certain moments. My inner child appreciated it greatly, and my breathing lengthened, became deeper and more serene. It had been a very long time since I had felt such letting go, such a true sensation of wellbeing.
What remains with me from our encounter? The memory:
- of having been cocooned for a few hours. That is precious.
- of having met someone devoted to their art, convinced and convincing.
- of having received an attention to my body that was unusual and comforting.
The encounter with a very beautiful person, beyond the very good masseur. To whom I take pleasure in writing this testimonial.
SANDRO, 38 YEARS OLD, ANTONY
Bruno, I rejoice so much in our encounter. There is a complicity between us that allows me to go ever further in the discovery of myself, and I am very grateful to you for the work you do. Thank you!
I cannot help but share with you my testimonial about a feeling that has lived in me for a week. Our last massage was very powerful and revealing of many things. An unblocking took place, and it manifests now not only in my intimate relationships, but also in my professional ones and in everyday life — with my friends, in leisure, in my free time. Life is going rather well; I feel more fulfilled, and sexuality has gained other dimensions, more pleasant and relaxed, since the experience of the massage.
The day after the massage, I had written a short testimonial: You brought me love — the love that I so missed from childhood. You healed me. You led me on an inner journey, unusual, intense on the emotional, physical and psychological levels. You demonstrate a certain power — or rather an energetic potency — that produces respiratory, physical and psychological effects on the person being massaged.
You do not abuse this power. I want you to massage me again, in order to heal further still — perhaps more deeply. You involve your whole being, as evidenced by the sound of your breath, your energy, the warmth of your hands. I thank you infinitely. I want to congratulate you for all the love you diffuse among people. You accompany people in loving their body, in taking care of it. I travelled through my birth and then the path all the way to today.
I want to write this short testimonial about what I felt during the massage.
Ode to the masseur:
Oil, soft music. Applying oneself to massaging every part of the body — arms, buttocks, feet — with the same gentleness. It is there, in this joyful concentration, this desire for wellbeing, that mindfulness takes shape: one massages, the other receives, and both are enveloped in the same vibratory cocoon. The art of being an experienced masseur.
Thanks to this second massage, I perceived my body as a ray of light.
Ode to the body:
I am on the path toward a less severe gaze upon it. I am less ashamed to expose this naked body to your eyes. This body is a source of life energy.
Ode to the Kashmiri massage:
Thank you, for you were able to bring me to a total letting go. I allowed myself to « lose my mind. » I felt an intense flux radiating through every cell of my body. This rising sap transformed into energy that gave the body the desire to arch, to move, to sway. Arms open wide to better receive this pleasure.
Wonder, an avalanche of vibrations, music beneath my skin, heart in flames, beatitude… For a few seconds I lost the sense of time, of reality. I heard the sound of your voice… I came back…
Once the massage was finished, I dozed off — calm, serene.
Thank you for this time of rest given.
My testimonial: This long massage, very slow, deeply relaxed me.
During the massage, I particularly loved the slowness of the gestures, the delicacy of your touch. I noticed with curiosity that certain parts of my body responded more than others — sometimes where I least expected it.
During the massage, I also loved the resonance of our conversation that preceded it. As I had not looked into what tantra is beforehand, I did not retain everything from your explanations. But they nonetheless gave a great deal of meaning to several positions and gestures — above all, the idea of the serpent, the kundalini, uncoiling.
Our exchange also allowed me to be in total trust — which, in the end, given the involvement of the masseur that one feels rather strongly, is not always so self-evident. But the fact of having spoken about it beforehand makes it possible to feel reassured.
In the end, I can say that I found this moment absolutely incredible. I will return! I will also ask my partner whether he wants to try the experience.
Thank you very much for this magnificent moment outside of time.
I send you with pleasure this testimonial following the massage: Without a doubt, one of the best massages I have ever received. I felt at ease immediately, which allowed me to feel this massage fully. Excellent touch. Great kindness. A great deal of intuition. I felt carried, accompanied, and I experienced a deep wellbeing beyond the body. Time and all known dimensions then disappeared. Everything was perfect.
The other seems a flux, a gas that merges and masses with the space which, itself, inscribes itself as the mould of my body and keeps its imprint — I have then neither skin nor bone, and the organs seem set aside; only the senses and their perception remain. Each movement — each moment — displaces the environment along with it. The hands that act — they act: that is enough — do not touch me; they carry me… into the imaginary country they conjure. Then, a kind of geography takes shape, creating a republic in which eroticism is a virtue that makes one grow — to advance, in this world, is a wandering — and tenderness a nourishment. Eros has with happiness guaranteed itself against Thanatos. Sex ennobles itself, the trivial recedes, sensuality rises, touch becomes the proof of humanity in the alliance of hand and mind. It is a number of heaven that I do not know — beyond the seventh?
After the calm of an almost ethereal meditation that comes in satisfaction and contentment, from the valetudinarian one feels nimble.
My testimonial from my experience. Astonishing and enchanting. Astonishing because it is a global approach in which nothing is left aside. Everything is taken into account — mind, body, emotions, needs, beliefs. You welcome everything with a natural and serene kindness, a professional and respectful posture toward the other, a protocol that is adapted and adaptable.
Enchanting because once the mind lets go, the body speaks and the dance begins within. In short, a wonderful experience to be repeated, a work on oneself that has begun and wishes to continue along this path. Thank you, universe, for this beautiful encounter.
I promised you — and I promised myself — to write a testimonial on your site. Our encounter was exactly two months ago and I have still not managed it. I realise that I cannot find words capable of transcribing the fullness of that moment and everything it brought me. I cannot describe the deep and intimate experience. What I can say, however, is what my wife said to me when we made love on my return — which is without question an objective manifestation of it, without wishing to limit it to the sexual act alone: « I have never felt you so open… »
For all of this, my dear Bruno, I will never be able to thank you enough.
You asked me for a testimonial after my massage. Here it is — very short.
Thank you for yesterday, Bruno, it was great. You accompany with a great deal of delicacy and attentiveness.
I discovered you through a directory of tantric massage practitioners. I questioned myself, informed myself a little. I asked myself many questions. Would I dare? To discover something else, to discover myself, to push back the barriers. I called you. I hesitated still. I went. And I plunged in without reserve. I had the experience of a first tantric massage — comforting, safe, enveloping and respectful. Through very slow, sometimes firm movements, you bring the body to receive vibrations and fullness.
I had the impression of a dance of hands, of fingers — a swirling dance. Through the light touches, energies were subtly awakened in me and flooded my fulfilled body. At the same time, deep breaths carried me very far toward something unknown to me until then. Thank you for this journey, for your beautiful presence, your attentive listening and your respect. And when the massage is finished, it is not finished. Something continues to circulate, like a peaceful energy.
MAUD, 46 YEARS OLD, ORLEANS
Thank you again for all the time you gave me during the massage. A space-time so long and so short; so real, yet also anchored in another world. After the massage and until yesterday I felt as if cut in two: one part of me was joyful, the other felt a deep sadness. A state of being — physical and emotional — that the mind did not recognise, flirting with astonishment: between two worlds.
I believe this massage continued to shift the cursor of my bodily and emotional experience in relation to men and to my own masculinity — toward something softer (though strong and directed). More attentive, more intentional, more sensitive… more luminous.
I am living wonderful massages in total trust — and this from the very first appointment. Hence this new testimonial. Since then, I have been gradually taming this body and taking care of it.
This time, I experienced sensations unknown to me until now. A journey toward the intangible.
The words that follow will not completely translate what I felt. It is difficult for me. And I may perhaps be pushing doors already open. Never mind — I DARE.
At a certain moment during the massage, a trembling in the lower belly appeared, radiating and spreading through the hollows and valleys of my body. A bubbling of pleasure that rose inexorably…
I let myself go in this bath of relaxation, of opening, with jubilation. The breath, the touch and the sounds accompanied the vibration I perceived.
An infinite movement of waves. This current resonated at the heart of every cell. An explosion of the senses. Sweetness. Tears of happiness flowed. Every pore of the skin opened to release bubbles of sensuality.
Breath of skin, intoxication, enchantment, animality.
Indeed, I became a fish for a moment: undulation, oceanic movement.
It seems to me that your expert masseur’s hands guided, enveloped, or allowed to float this flow of carnal, sensual life.
In this space-time, this energy of life came, went, returned. When this fluid rose along the spine — I believe — I was transported. My body moved, my arms danced, my fingers vibrated under the intensity of the spasms of delight. A moment of grace.
What joy for me to know these emotions.
Here is my feedback after the tantric massage session.
I came with a great deal of apprehension, but carried by my approach — initiated a few years ago — of connecting with my inner child and experiencing feminine pleasure.
The time taken to explain the approach, the reassuring framework, the meaning of this massage, and the attentive listening to my personal story, allowed me completely to feel at ease in this serene space, full of good energies. Your personality plays a large part in this too.
The two hours of massage were so gentle — the light touches over every zone of the body acted as if I were waking from a long sleep, like Sleeping Beauty.
During the massage, I even said to myself that nakedness was an obvious prerequisite.
The seated position face to face, with me on your thighs in an embrace, was so wonderful that I imagined what a baby might feel when it comes out of its mother’s womb and is placed skin to skin. I could have wished that this rocked embrace would never end.
I was so much in a bubble that I even accepted a massage of the face and scalp — whereas I hate having oily, dishevelled hair.
On my return, I called a friend to share what I was feeling, and she told me that my voice had changed — much softer than usual.
Leaving, I knew that a second session, more centred on certain areas, would be necessary.
I am convinced that these massages will allow me to be more at ease in a new romantic relationship, and that my body will resonate — freed from my great lack of confidence in myself and in my capacity to experience pleasure.
Thank you infinitely, Bruno, for your presence, your understanding and your approach.
Human a few seconds ago
ok
For a first encounter, I loved your touch and the way you massaged. I find that you have a beautiful quality of listening — without judgement and without too much of a « paternalistic » side. I felt on equal footing — without a power dynamic of the kind « I am going to tell you what you feel and how you should live and manage it » — which I have encountered too often recently with certain men, when my need was simply to be heard without necessarily being agreed with. But without hasty judgements and conclusions about me, of the kind that I am jealous and I don’t do enough of this or that, or that I am not enough in acceptance or in love. I don’t think that love is all love and all acceptance — I think that certain people confuse love with the fear of not being loved.
So everything must be accepted with a smile and one tells oneself one is in « Love. » For me, all of this is illusion — there is only fear that binds these ties. But I can understand now that it can be difficult to plunge into that fear and move beyond the illusion, in order to destroy everything and thus rebuild everything.
Let us say that now, I have compassion — and that is already a great deal for me. For the anger that inhabited me has calmed considerably, and it does me a great deal of good. And I understood all of this thanks to you and your listening — so welcoming, and without telling me that what I felt was not right. Whereas now, I know that what I feel is in its right place, and that I will be able to use this « anger » in a more just relationship with myself and with others.
So thank you!
I owed you a response about your massage. Excellent — I carried its benefits with me longer than with a traditional massage. It is certainly one of the best massages I have ever received.
A short testimonial: It had been a long time since I had been touched like that — even with a Shiva whom I loved greatly and with whom I walked a stretch of the path. There was in your massage something both gentle and very virile. I felt enveloped, contained, gathered together. It was like a dance. A pity I did not write it in the moment. I had the impression that you knew my body by heart, to traverse it in such a way. It was good to let myself go, for I sensed something intuitive, professional!
Thank you for the time you gave me, without expecting anything in return. You came to repair what I had just lived through in the retreat. I had found myself twice with the same Shiva, where I had had to take the role of reassuring him, containing him — and where I had ultimately experienced a great deal of frustration! Gratitude, Bruno, for this delicious moment that I do not forget and that still nourishes me.
It will soon be a week since the last massage session, and I continue to feel its benefits. Or rather, I have the impression that the benefits have become permanent — engrammed.
Something has opened inside me; a genuine space is now present. The knots, the blockages have disappeared, and I have the sensation of being able to dance in a circle around my centre. It is difficult for me to find the words — I feel reunited.
I believe that the massage — you — for it is necessary to feel well accompanied, respected and heard, have meant that I am no longer in avoidance or in revolt against what seems to me painful or unjust. Now, I accept and I am able to welcome. The obstacle is the path, and once looked at face to face, it becomes one more flower on my road, for it has helped me to grow and to move forward.
You have brought a great deal of beauty into my life, and I am infinitely grateful to you for it.
I thank you from the depths of my heart and my body for the massage you gave me on Wednesday. Here is my testimonial:
I came to you very damaged, but you knew how to listen to me, to understand my wound. You welcomed me with a gentleness and a kindness I had not felt for a long time.
I was instantly at ease under your gaze. The first contacts of your hands moved me beyond words, triggering shivers and waves of emotion that I could not contain. I was knotted — and thanks to the slowness, the breadth, the delicacy of your gestures, you soothed me.
Your hands, your body, your words reassured me and I felt beautiful. The massage revealed a great deal to me about myself and about the path that remains for me to walk. It will be long, to erase — or at least soften — the imprint of so many years. But I can at last glimpse a glimmer of light, thanks to you.
Thank you infinitely.
I am happy to finally take the time to write you this testimonial.
First of all, many things have « moved » since your visit: I came out of it animated by an intense feeling of wellbeing, of inner radiance.
I think back with emotion to the time we spent together. I believe that the feeling of not being rushed, of escaping from timed standards, helps enormously in feeling ready to let go — and in not having the impression of being taken as a statistic in an Excel spreadsheet. Immediately, I felt confusedly at ease with you, during our conversation: your questions were always formulated with gentleness and attention, with the concern of knowing me better, and I had the impression of talking with an old friend.
Coming from a rather « uptight » family, where the body and emotions have no place or means of expression, yoga and meditation guided me toward finding an inner dialogue with the body and emotions — and it was as if this massage had been a natural step in this journey, a facilitator, a reconnector to the self. The reconnection, I feel, is made possible not only by the technique of the massage, which you master, but also by the additional soul and respect you bring to it, through your touch, your words.
During the beginning of the massage, I felt overwhelmed by many emotions — some linked to my father, who died very early. At the risk of sounding a little psychoanalytical — which I am not very fond of — I had the impression of finally receiving attention and affection from another man, a form of attention not linked to a dynamic of sexual relations.
My fears concerning premature ejaculation dissolved of their own accord: once launched into the adventure with you, I no longer thought about it. And I am still surprised to have been able to « hold on, » to « live through » this rather… close exchange without ejaculating — whereas sometimes, as I told you, the mere graze of my lower abdomen can put me in difficulty, which generally leads me to avoid « standard » massages, after a few rather embarrassing situations in the past.
From the moment I « let go, » from the moment I began to manage to abandon myself completely, few articulated or articulable memories remain: I believe I remember the sensation of always being able, if needed, to hold on to you — literally — if I lost my footing. A feeling of sexual pleasure, certainly, but one that was in the service of a radiance, a kind of inner power that would not come at the expense of others, but with the other.
Well. I will make ellipses. You are a perceptive man — you will understand. The massage is a moment of relaxation and meditation, and allowed me two things. It is an intimate moment of letting go, and I am currently working to understand what happened to me… why, and what it revealed in me. I have a very great memory and a capacity for absorbing alcohol… never a fainting, never a blackout. And a very particular sexuality.
Not everyone allows themselves to be massaged. And certain modest places — or whatever it may be in the body, depending on the moment of life — can be delicate. As for me, the general massage did me good. For I let my physical reactions run free. I would say as if, thanks to your hands, I was making love to myself. Wellbeing with oneself. It did not bother me that you touched me — I was concentrated on myself and on what I was feeling. On my memories, the desires or quiet sensations or fantasies that it brought me. Afterwards, over these past months, something revealed itself to me about my sexuality, my maternity, my absence of letting go. […]
MAËL, 30 YEARS OLD, PARIS
I recognise that it made me feel many things — excitement, obviously, but also love, tenderness, a desire to merge. A little hard for me to accept that nothing can happen, but I sincerely understand your approach.
She comes to see me for a massage. A breakup a few months earlier, her joy of living disconnected, her libido at the bottom of a well. A single massage. The very next day, she sends me a text:
Her: Goal achieved. All I have to do now is manage the desire to make love that I have found again! In the meantime, I am savouring the benefits of your massage and of this first experience… Unforgettable.
My response: Thank you for this feedback. You mean that this great door, facing you, closed for months, bolted with its multiple locks, has opened a crack? That air, desires, have started circulating again?
Her: I opened the door, but you found the key.
Then two days later, still her: In the last 24 hours, 3 people have remarked on the positive energy I was giving off — that I had found again. You have revived me…
This testimonial echoes an oral account given by another woman a few months ago. Astonished, because what she had connected through the massage had once again made her visible, identifiable, in the eyes of those around her. Something that had not happened to her for a long time…
Dear Bruno, I hope your day is going well in this beautiful autumn sunshine.
As for me, I confess that I have felt a little stirred up since yesterday. I have the impression of being on my little cloud. Once again, I tell myself — thankfully I did not listen to the small voices telling me to be reasonable, proper, respectable, and did not cancel this moment of pure happiness. I feel raw with sensation and at the same time full of energy — I even shed a few tears in the car, not of sadness but of wellbeing and serenity, of acceptance of myself, of my body as it is, of its desires, of what remains in it of beauty and femininity, of strengths, of weaknesses, of imperfections.
It is a true soothing for me — your massages, your words, your listening, your kindness, your gentleness on the scars of my body and those less visible ones of the soul. It is so liberating not to feel judged, to let oneself slide into these moments of total pleasure, outside of time and space, to feel like a woman — beautiful, heard, accompanied, respected… Thank you for accompanying me on this path of soothing with myself, my life, and for helping me find the resources within me to continue moving forward, to have ever greater confidence in myself and to fully savour every moment that presents itself to me. I will never be able to thank you enough for that. See you soon.
« Marie, you do not know your body » — that is what my partner said to me, promising me a unique, revelatory moment for someone like me, who is ultra-sensitive. He gave me the experience of a lifetime… I was forewarned, then. There would be a before and an after. And yet — I was light years away from imagining the experience I was about to live.
First, your gaze, which welcomed me and soothed me. The effect is immediate: I knew I could tell you everything — why I was there, what traumas I had lived through, the humiliation experienced, the forgetting of myself, sometimes its negation… the path I had undertaken toward myself in order to finally exist… as Marie. And the Word takes on its full meaning with you — this freedom to speak (or not): you welcome everything, you feel, you share. We are beyond kindness; you are very real nonetheless, very grounded in reality, and at the same time an incarnation: Freedom is you.
For the first time in my life I feel like a human being: I am naked before you, without shame, with this body I am learning with difficulty to love, to care for. My nakedness does not bother me — it is natural. I feel peaceful, in total safety: nothing can happen to me, and I begin to understand… You connect me to the World. Suddenly I am five years old.
The massage begins and I let myself go… as never before… and I feel my body. Your hands are above my back and I feel myself vibrate. It is a sensation never experienced before… as if you were calling it and it was answering you. And that is exactly it: an infinite gentleness settles in; for the first time in my life my brain disconnects. Under your hands and the infinite, disinterested love they transmit, my body comes to life. Free. Novel, indescribable sensations — I no longer belong to myself… My body lives, startles. I am not even sure where you are placing your hands. The warm oil is a soothing, comforting blanket — feeling you so close to me too. And you come to massage my belly. A circular massage, insistent like Ravel’s Bolero. I have the impression of being an implosion of tiny bubbles — I abandon myself… this belly that has suffered so much, endured so much, been so little loved: it answers you, and it is so intense and gentle at the same time that I depart… I do not know where, but into an elsewhere never visited, that recognises and erases that past… an incredible energy floods through me; this love you transmit carries me — and yet my eyes are closed: I am no longer afraid.
Tantric massage as Bruno practises it is above all an experience of Life — yes, with a capital L. Outside of time. Extra-sensory: an emotional catharsis that allowed me to continue releasing toxic feelings such as guilt, pain, shame. This is the beauty of this massage: one accesses one’s traumas, and you transcend them. This communion between us flooded me, healed me and made me grow. I cannot wait to continue this path with you, Bruno. You have the grace to share this supplement of soul and this unconditional love that our world so lacks. You are simply… indispensable. T.h.a.n.k.y.o.u.
(Editor’s note: I swear I do not write these testimonials!)
My intention: to meet my desire. To stop over-adapting.
It began by showing me that I was using my vital energy to imprison my desire, to hold it back. Yet it is very powerful — and the force of tension, of tightening required to restrain it is all the stronger and more exhausting for that. To stop struggling against oneself, against the depths of oneself — of the Self — which asks only to emerge.
In the body, in the experience, it unfolded in the following way:
A very slow process of entering the Present, into sensation — of traversing everything that was keeping me from it, which are fears. With my fears, I was holding my desire. If I wanted to go toward my desire, I had to accept entering into the fears. It was a question of letting myself fall into them, of no longer struggling to avoid this. In doing so, little by little and very slowly, I allowed myself to be surprised by the arrival of a trance. At that moment, it is no longer my small self that is in command — it is my deep desire. The image of a dragon unfolding. I become one, a unity, with the dragon that is in me and with this fundamental energy.
Following this trance, a great release — a great letting go. Physical, nervous, mental.
I returned home feeling one, whole, truly belonging to myself, connected to that depth which means I can no longer be dependent on anything else. I have this « thing » that inhabits me. I simply need to connect to it, not forget to connect to it, not cut myself off from It.
I have the impression that having been in conscious contact with this energy means I will never be quite as I was before. Something has unified — as if this force were an elixir. A connection has been made, and one cannot go back.
This energy can now radiate within me. It is no longer kept under a bushel, covered over with so many things. It can diffuse into every part of my being.
I have met myself so fully that I have this sense that I will never again be dependent on the gaze of others — and in particular on the gaze of a man.
It is no longer dependence, because I am self-sufficient in my desire.
I do not need a man in order to have desire in life, in order to have a desire for life.
A man is not what makes me feel alive or feel whole. I am whole before I have met him.
This reframes the relationship.
The day after the experience, a completely different, new sense of myself. I feel like a woman differently.
I have the impression of having drawn from a mysterious, unknown space within me. Of having opened up a whole part of myself that changes my inner experience — something that releases, that soothes. Being a woman — not a little girl who has grown up.
INFINITELY THANK YOU, Bruno, for what you made possible, for your framework which I feel to be very healthy and safe. For this constant attention to what is present, for this respect of my rhythm, of the progressiveness I needed — which was fundamental for me.
Listening, a sadness allows itself to emerge. This morning, she knows she can step out of her greyness. New colours are all there for her. The body’s hearths light and extinguish themselves intermittently. Emotions — small, cautious animals — draw close to the fires that kindle in the body, warm themselves. The thymus exhales dust that lifts away like old scabs. I had a wounded knee right in the middle of my chest! There, I cradled it more. There, these benevolent hands, the respectful and gentle space — so gentle — soften, nourish, open the space…
In the unspeakable, my new world all warm, pulsing, like a reassuring smile, emerges. Like the dawn, your hands cleave the past and instruct my being. I am learning. My skin is learning. It drinks the present. Your skin. Your presence is water.
Breathing together, without stakes. I am alive and I am learning. What is another? Who, what is this I of the interior? Our mirror neurons like pendants shimmer. They dance. Your shoulder, my arm, our whole bodies in motion… Within, a goddess blossoms. She holds two serpents in her full hands. Flashes of flesh, twigs of rivers, signs. She has wings — a curious hybridisation between two goddesses… To brandish ostentatiously the energy of the present.
I breathe here, listening. I feed on this symmetry. The waves of heat swell the breath. I am a cup set in balance. The air fills the base of the cup, smooths its circumference. I draw this widening of the present into my sex. I welcome it on this path of bone and flesh toward the heart. I astonish you, I astonish myself.
Suspension — our gazes take note of this instant. Withdrawal, listening, witnesses. The resonance passes through me. This space is mine. I have chosen to be a gardener. I will take care of the beauty in me, for me, all around me — even if I do not yet know the gestures.
Life is intelligent. If one listens to it, it places before you the person, the energy, the most right one you need in the moment. To move forward, to reveal, to permit, to allow oneself to be traversed by it. It invites you, it breathes the idea into you. It knows with exactitude, it proposes with a smile and takes charge of the spaces still hesitating. I find myself here, then, face to face with the unknown. Yet I am animated by peace, joy and curiosity. There is something in me that knows, with an almost arrogant certainty, that this moment is to be lived.
I perceived in you instantly something extremely reassuring. I saw kindness, intelligence, generosity, sensitivity, strength, integrity… I found all these qualities present. Without that, what followed could not have been possible.
I lived this moment both as an observer of how my body was receiving and feeling your hands and your energy, and in the receptivity of this gift. Afterwards, I had no access to what had been lived during this massage. My body wished to give back no information — neither sensations nor images. As if it had absorbed everything, integrated everything, into the very depths of each of its cells. As if it wished to keep this intact, belonging only to itself. Like something that is lived only in the instant. That to relive, it will be a new moment — and not the attempt, slightly usurping, to replay something mentally. I insisted a little, but no — it was not possible, and that made me smile. I felt my body and my whole being full.
I was touched by the energies that exchange, read, speak and tell themselves in silence. I lived the rightness of the instant in the truth of bodies, integrity respected — in feeling completely welcomed, unjudged, heard. The absence of intention and expectation. The infinite gentleness and poetry of the moment, the vulnerability that invites itself in. The body that gently offers itself to your hands, which it does not know but which it recognises in this instant as existing only for it. Feeling my body transform, to the rhythm of the energies, tensions and emotions that pass through it. Always changing, listening to what is at play in the moment.
I also saw my heart invite itself in, accepting to open spaces — in the recognition of receiving. Of being seen and perceived as I am. The heart and the body looking at each other, watching each other, amused and touched by one another. I saw a door appear. A door that opens onto a field of possibility, a proposal — that I know is there, respectful of my choices to come.
I thank life for having proposed this moment. And I thank you above all, for having given it the most authentic and fitting intensity.
A few words following the intense moment I lived with you on Saturday.
An opening moment, revelatory, teaching.
Several questions and observations were metabolised on this occasion.
What space do I open within myself, from myself to myself, to my intimate?
How do I listen to what my body says?
Even more listening this time to what was happening in my sensations — how the massage was inviting me to bring consciousness to the places you were touching. As if your hand were a magnet with north polarity and my sensation, on the inner side of the skin, the magnet with south polarity. And the two magnets travelled together along the body, each on its own side of the skin. Concentrating my sensation on the new, unexpected quality of the caress, they appeared to me as healing, renewing.
What space do I open within myself, in a deep listening to myself, in relation to a man?
Do I allow myself to receive so much patience — perhaps to generate frustration? According to the biases through which I look at things. To observe these biases.
Do I allow myself to receive so many revelations about myself through the other?
Do I accept the possibility that in certain spaces, I can let go of what I believe I know about myself, in order to learn about myself through the other?
This last experience offered me the possibility of opening more than usual to the energy of your body, of your sensuality. This physical, sensory opening still inhabits me.
On the way back on my bicycle, I found the boldness to look at men, to hold their gazes — I was light, yet I felt the vulnerability of this space I was suddenly opening, like a floor of myself from which I had never lived. Out of fear. Out of panic, even, I believe. I was activating a function that had been dormant throughout my entire life. I found that tremendously daring. Surprising and delicious. And at the same time, I was becoming a magnet for gazes… I was thinking back to our exchange on this subject. Perhaps even thinking back to it is what helped me activate it…
Thank you infinitely for your framework of total respect, kindness, gentleness, patience — supple as the membrane of the skin — in which simple love is present.
This framework allows now the explosion, now the erosion, of certain inner enclosures, inherited from many memories and conditionings.
I am discovering myself as a woman — sexed and sexual.
I was not able to find the time to give you feedback sooner.
I wanted to thank you again for the experience you were able to give me — so powerful. I find that it is truly a gift of oneself to be present and to be able to accompany us in this experience in such a way.
You asked me to give you a written account of what I experienced, traversed with you. I am not quite sure what to say. It is rather vague. The sensation of having traversed… as in a dream… and what to say of it…? Perhaps I should have written this more quickly? Or perhaps spoken about it immediately afterwards, so that words could anchor this experience.
It is rather vague. Rather gradual. I know that on two occasions I felt — I had the sensation of feeling — that women need to be protected. That there was an important need for the world, for men, to take care of women. I felt that I needed to be protected.
Did I feel the distress of Ukrainian women?
I was very grateful and I felt good — protected and recognised in your arms. Thank you very much, for that too.
And during the culminating point, the climax, I needed to open my mouth to breathe. I admit that I wanted to… But perhaps that is anecdotal — my mind taking back space — whereas afterwards I truly had the sensation of abandoning myself and forgetting. Of no longer being here, on earth. And the mind switched off. And I was gone.
I find this account rather undeveloped compared to the richness of this experience and of the exchanges we were able to have afterwards — but so it is. I no longer remember very much. And I believe that the fact of having forgotten is also a good sign that my mind did indeed switch off, and that my body finally expressed itself. I believe I would have liked to give it even more space. For it to be able to express itself more. The opportunity to go further.
Thank you again.
I have gone on holiday… to see what will unfold from it. I am observing.
Hello.
So… this last massage. Which was the second with you. Was truly very different from the first — in which I really departed into the cosmos, meaning I had truly disconnected. The mind fell silent. What a deliverance!
And here, for this massage, it unfolded in a truly different way from the first. Already I had the sensation that it took place in two parts.
The first part — I truly had the sensation that my body was expressing itself, that it was really freer in its movements, permitted to move as it wished. And it was a truly very powerful experience. I truly felt the woman freeing herself. The powerful woman. Sure of herself. As opposed to the little girl. The voluptuous and sensual woman. Strong — in the sense of present. Strongly present, therefore. Really there. And expressing herself. Living.
I truly felt safe. Within a framework in which I could express myself, let free rein to everything that came. Without the slightest of my small gestures being able to be interpreted in any way whatsoever.
It was quite powerful, and I found you very strong too in maintaining this safe framework. In this way, everything could express itself — it carried no consequence.
Then.
The second part of the massage was at first disappointing for me. For I stopped. My body no longer wanted to. « Asleep. » And I was telling myself that I could not react like this. And I was telling myself that I could not say so. And on reflection, I am very happy to have heard it. To have listened to my body, and above all to have expressed out loud that I no longer wanted to continue. This too is a very beautiful step for me — in addition to having let the woman express herself during the first part of the massage: I was able to express what I no longer wanted. Without fearing any consequence whatsoever… and that is truly wonderful.
To be continued…
Thank you again for these massages. I truly feel that I am climbing steps — each of which is a mountain — and that I am progressing and changing enormously. Thank you very much for this safe framework you are able to offer me. I am impressed by your management, your mastery and your composure.
AMELIE, 38 years old, PARIS
I had gentleness and warmth — through your hands of course, but also through your breath, your belly, your arms, your shoulders. I swam slowly in that tranquil, tender space with no apparent limit, where you welcomed me — and I could have stayed there for hours more. Through your words and your voice, I had access to lightness. Your hands caressed my body, but your words and your voice caressed my mind. For a moment, I was finally beautiful without question or suspicion, in the eyes of a stranger — as I dream of being when walking in the street. […]
Dear Bruno,
A little poem of gratitude — I offer it to you with pleasure, so do with it as you wish.
Thank you Bruno for this exchange,
Which connects me to my body of light.
I feel a bliss that has no range,
When your hands begin their flight.
A little girl comes to appear,
And breaks into resounding laughter.
The inner child is full of cheer,
You accompany her, smiling after.
My body suddenly ripples with glee,
You realise how beautiful this is.
The artist in me expresses freely —
I use more than words in moments like this.
I take pleasure in blossoming wide,
My body exults in sensation.
I never want again to hide,
But hold these beautiful emotions.
Your hands are of gold, so very pure,
Adorned with the softest of velvet.
They will never know wear or allure,
You surround them with Love — all of it.
You honour all women with grace,
You see only the Royal woman.
You ensure she finds her rightful place,
You would even lead her to the sacredumen.
Dear Bruno,
I was first of all surprised to find myself in a state of trust in which I could listen to my sensations and feelings without thinking of anything else.
My skin and my body made contact with your hands and the beginning of the massage through a rather strong sensation of warmth that you were diffusing.
I felt an energy awakening and beginning to circulate — from the touch of the massage to the furthest possible limits of my body, both in depth and in circulation spreading beneath the skin. Then what was happening within me became larger than my bodily envelope. I was becoming an energy. I felt enveloped, carried, transported in a fluid and sensual dance. I was losing the sense of space and time. I was letting my body freely express its language of ecstasy in languorous movements. I felt bewitched by my freedom of being.
Highly receptive to the energy — its comings and goings, its waves carrying me further than the limits I had supposed myself to have — I felt like a strong and powerful source within myself. Above all after the time given to my yoni. A time of repair and realisation that she has her place, and that she too is free to express herself.
It is thanks to this immense respect that you embody in your massage that I was able to let emerge, without fear, my desire to live as a sensual and liberated woman. You allowed me, in this body-to-body exchange — sometimes very powerful through a harmony of exchange — to feel in harmony with myself. Doors have opened within me, and continue to open. I believe I have finished being this woman-child, in order to be fully a woman. You accompanied me in this energetic, sensory and spiritual transformation… even corporeal.
You are a noble knight of the sensitive and of the heart, in service of a quest for transformation in those you touch with your hands as with your intentions.
With deep gratitude, I encourage you to continue your projects.
To move beyond my fears, to confront my inner demons, to face my limits, to question my beliefs, to release my prohibitions — in order to go to the deepest part of myself and my body in total freedom and trust. Such was the thread of Ariadne I had given myself for approaching this massage, which I knew in advance would be initiatory and transformative. I did not know how, or through which door, to enter.
I arrived with great trust in the relationship, having beforehand sounded out the integrity of the man who was going to accompany me in meeting myself differently. I felt ready to receive this gift. But I did not imagine that I was going to reconnect with wounds inscribed in the deepest part of my cells — wounds that had never until now been welcomed in connection with the body. This body that was nothing but tension, closure, trembling, startling, pain, fears… all these sensations were welcomed with patience, kindness, great respect and containment, until it yielded and gave itself permission to cross through the mirror — with the courage to choose another path, not to remain imprisoned in that curse of abuse, in order to transform the relationship with my sensations in connection with the other.
After a form of loyalty struggle with my suffering — the very suffering that had led me to protect myself, to double-lock every possibility of feeling, of positioning myself and saying no. I was afraid of my fear. Every contact was difficult to welcome. I, who believed myself sensual and open — all my skin was crying « No, this is unbearable! » I was wondering how to escape from this infernal circle.
With infinite patience and great delicacy, your fingers settled on me — on my back, my shoulders, my vibrating belly, on guard. The energy of transformation, through its gaze of infinite consideration, began its work of transformation. The safety of the framework of non-acting-out, the unconditional love in the welcoming of what I was in that moment, finally calmed my mind — guided my cells to no longer imprison themselves in fear, and to dare to begin moving parts of my body, to adjust to the proposal of doing things differently, of crossing the door of the mechanisms of resistance to open a crack of possibilities.
What power — and at the same time what inner peace after the massage. I was able to measure how much this could pacify my inner demons, make gentleness flow into the deepest part of my cells, joy into my heart, power into my pelvis — like a commitment with myself to never again force my way through, to respect myself and to be honoured only by men who are conscious of this immense vulnerability offered in love. That sets the bar high… at the height of my need for safety in order to offer what I hold most precious: the love and energy of my sacred feminine — that intense fire that burns in my belly, that asks only to be shared and offered, on condition of being respected, welcomed in gentleness and delicacy, in openness of heart and consciousness of the soul.
Bruno, you asked me to write about this first time, if I had the heart or the desire to do so. I reread the other testimonials on your site — what more can I say that these Others have not already said, and sometimes so well, with such acuity. These Others with whom I share you, and of whom I am inevitably a little jealous. Perhaps to say and develop what happened for me BEFORE taking the step of contacting you — in addition to the feeling of the massage you offer. I gathered my thoughts quickly, to keep them fresh.
Your name was mentioned in passing by someone I did not know well and in whom I had no particular trust. But there it was — on your site you write and describe many beautiful things: experiences, personal journey… The tone is right, sincere, and we share in part a common past. Reading between the lines to know « who are you really, Bruno? » — through your words, your own description and the sketched, indirect one of the testimonials left by these Others, like your reflection in a blurred mirror. Recognising one of one’s own kind, guessing more than knowing. I leap into the unknown by writing you a message like a bottle cast to sea, in which I speak of my wish to live the experience you describe, and also of the time needed to tame each other — like the fox in The Little Prince. I, who am not especially at ease with the masculine, find paradoxically that you are a man reassuring. A first contact by telephone — the Little Prince’s voice is warm and deep, very deep — and the fox I am, on the alert, rather silver-grey the better to pass unnoticed… Your questions are direct but without any intention of cornering me in my own contradictions. I answer you without detour, to my own astonishment, and with a great deal of trust — a feeling most unusual for me, hypervigilance, supervision and analysis being far more familiar to me. And so the appointment is made, the step is taken.
A few weeks later, you welcome me to your home — a hushed atmosphere, green plants reaching to the ceiling. You have a green thumb and the constancy to care for them over long periods, relayed by your neighbours with whom you maintain faithful relations during the weeks you are absent. You question me about my wishes for this experience and my motivations — I reveal myself sincerely. Although completely new to this domain, I feel no apprehension or fear, yet I cannot anticipate in advance my reactions or my limits. I leave you to your risk-taking in relation to what you sense of me and what you are going to offer me.
We then move into your other room. From the very outset, we face each other — and there you take me in your fraternal, paternal arms. My barriers collapse; I let myself be guided and abandon myself completely. You draw me and carry me into this slow and gentle journey. I trust your mooring — the waters are calm and I am rocked at moments by the song of whales. Eyes closed, not seeking to think — simply to live the present moment — I am in an amniotic bubble where sounds, warmth and tactile pressure on my body interweave. I give you my hand at moments and anchor myself to you as to a mooring, so as not to drift. Time no longer exists — a suspended moment.
I will never forget it. That is all.
I left your home a little too quickly, without saying thank you at the height of what I had received, of what I had lived.
Such is the content of my message in the bottle cast to sea, which I entrust to the currents of the internet.
Dear Bruno,
I am taking the time to write you these few lines after our encounter yesterday, which was beautiful. I am still traversed by these flows of energy, of sensations that we shared — and it is very savorous, very restorative.
Writing also allows me to revisit what happened, for I sense that it is powerful and decisive for me. That there will be an after quite unlike what came before. I am infinitely grateful to you for having welcomed me with such generosity. Thank you.
I arrived at your home with apprehensions, but determined to cross the threshold of this door that appeared to me as an obvious necessity a few weeks ago, when I browsed your site. Already in your words, in the way you describe your practice, a space of safety, of trust and of immense openness unfolds. Hence my determination to come to you — while I am in the midst of rebuilding my life on every level…
I also arrived with this sensation of being cut in two, poorly unified, blocked following my separation. I was convinced that the touch of the massage would awaken old wounds, that I would cry — for I felt raw with emotion…
And everything unfolded differently. Everything went in the opposite direction from these initial sensations or projections. Once in the present moment, once welcomed by you, everything seemed simple — as if another language was making itself heard, another part of me, coming from another space.
I remember the first contact of your hand on my back like a detonation of warmth and gentleness. As if a signal had been given to the whole body that it could simply be — freely, without fear, without judgement, without objective. I do not believe I have ever encountered a space where this is possible with such radicality…
I also remember the meeting of our hands, which seemed very powerful to me. It is at once so ordinary and so incredible — two hands touching each other, at once nothing and everything…
I loved meeting your body in that intimacy. A flood of sensations surges. The generosity of your welcome moves me deeply — and yet the framework that has been established protects us. I sense that it is possible to go very far within this framework precisely because it is there, well established. I did not expect such intimacy, and I could never have glimpsed it other than in that present moment. For there, I do not know why, but it was possible — it was good. The warmth, the breath, the skin to skin — everything sets itself in circulation, everything diffuses.
I discover that desire can be lived and shared without ulterior motive, in complete safety. For me this is a fundamental, liberating teaching. I become aware that my sensation of being cut off is not linked to my own desire, but to the fact that I forbid myself from living it — out of fear, for I have often lacked the feeling of safety. But in the space you created, it was possible. I would like to continue exploring this part of myself within this framework, to internalise this safety and this trust, and to live them in other circumstances.
At moments, emotions of sadness surfaced slightly — in memory of my past relationship. But I have the impression that this sadness was no more than a remnant; it passed like a cloud that I also greeted with calm. The present was too strong, too alive for it to take over.
Thank you, Bruno.
Dear Bruno,
These few lines to share with you my experience of this second massage — to revisit it, to understand it, to attempt to shed light on what was at play for me…
Once again, thank you for having opened the space of possibilities — in welcome, in safety, in generosity.
I arrived in a very different energy from the first time — « back to life, » as you put it so beautifully. After the first massage and the tantra retreat — one having led to the other — I have the impression of having reconnected with safety, and of having released a core of fear and terror that was stagnating in my pelvis and partly cutting me off from it. Desire has returned in force, in joy — and I am no longer afraid of it. That changes everything. As I am no longer afraid of my desire — including sexual desire — I no longer feel threatened by men. It completely changes my gaze and my experience. I find you — I discover you — incredibly beautiful and attractive, and very, very touching in your vulnerability.
When we found ourselves face to face on the futon, I felt a powerful force of attraction toward you — your body, your presence, your beauty. There was a joyful, imperious desire to make contact with you, to merge into your arms. The yab yum position simply seemed obvious to me as a response to this need to magnetise myself to you — and therefore in some way to desire itself, to « leap in with both feet. » The near-immobility of the posture allowed me to attend to the vibrations of our two bodies and to feel profoundly connected. It was a true soothing. The contact of skins, the attention brought to breathing, the act of looking at each other — all of this multiplied tenfold this feeling of deep and restorative closeness. I felt my body imploding warmly — and it was irresistible to feel this intensity rising.
From there I have the impression that everything moves very quickly and powerfully. Desire is there — burning, vibrating, alive. I welcome it. And so the question of the limit arises. It is there too, clearly established, since the safety framework was stated at the beginning of the massage and I had agreed to it. But I feel the need to approach very close to this limit — I connect with the very strong temptation to cross it, without having either the intention or the possibility of doing so. But desire is powerfully present, and I want to give it full right of expression by going to confront its limit. In the moment I do not know exactly what I am seeking — but I believe I understand now: to verify that fear has completely disappeared, since it was fear that until now had been responsible for stopping desire, for taking it in hand in order to extinguish or alter it. So if desire is no longer to be feared, I want to follow it without restraint — this must be absolutely possible. The space you opened allowed me this. Only the limits established by the framework came to contain this desire — vibrant and more alive than ever. But they did not extinguish it, unlike fear or restraint.
Today I am here — it is to this energy that I need to give free rein…
Thank you, Bruno.
Dear Bruno,
Third massage. Another shift. But before coming to it, I just want to speak to you again about the experience of the second massage and how it continued to resonate in me until now.
So, the second massage: living desire is there, it has the right to manifest itself. Thanks to the space of trust you opened, I allowed myself this listening, this welcoming — all the way to the surge. This massage made that possible: moving beyond fear, experiencing joy, letting things come and going all the way if need be… In fact: testing the limit by confronting it. And being reassured: it is good — the limit is there, solidly established. But in the aftermath of the massage, I touched a place of panic, for I sincerely questioned myself about this desire to cross the framework by wanting to take desire into a sexual scenario already known — and therefore somewhat reassuring — as if that were its only outlet. Thank you for holding firm.
With hindsight, the feeling of panic was linked to the fact that at a certain point, I left you the sole responsibility for the framework. I know I had also committed to respecting it — but I am certain that if you had yielded, I would have followed, I would have allowed myself to be swept along by your desire and mine, without any doubt. At a certain point I had therefore placed you in charge of ensuring my safety — and that is frightening. When I became aware of this, I felt relieved: it allowed me to reclaim my own part too. I am indeed responsible for my desire and for the way in which I want and can live it. And I am also responsible for stating my limits to the other if they cross them by following only their own desire. Desire therefore cannot « carry me away » despite myself or despite the other — what a great relief. It may seem like nothing, but for me it is a great step. I have been confronted with people who allowed themselves to be swept along by their desire — sometimes in tragic ways — without concern for the consequences, and I was not always able to set my limits, for I was relying on them to do so. And I too have sometimes functioned that way. I therefore held this belief: desire is so powerful that it can carry us away, carry me away despite myself. Whereas it would be more accurate to say: desire is very powerful — certainly — and it can carry me away… but only if I decide to let it! Conversely: it can lead the other to do things I do not wish — unless I state my limits to them… In short, at one infinitesimal point: I became again the subject of my desire, no longer anxious about being subjected to it. Yet another great gain in safety.
The third massage arrives at this threshold.
I was happy to find you again — to nestle in your arms, between your hands. In total trust and… with a great deal of desire.
But this time the question of the limit is fully integrated within me — you have already demonstrated to me that it is fully so for you. It therefore no longer becomes the central question that must be constantly interrogated. I have the impression that this freed me from a tension. A different relationship to the massage opened up. I still desire you just as much — but that is no longer really the question. Desire is still there, fortunately — but it has lost its stakes, its drama. It is no longer correlated to the sexual question, since that is now mapped out. The situation has gained in lightness, in presence, in musicality. And so everything unfolded differently. A space of relaxation opened, and a new kind of listening became possible. It was truly new, this listening — something else entirely. As a result, it gave me a much more intense access to the sensation of touch, to movement, to silence, to breath, to skin. Everything was more intense — yet this intensity was dispassionate. I truly felt your hands very strongly — much more than the other times — your gestures, their movement. Everything moved me deeply, with lightness. And I had the sensation that we were meeting in this movement, that we were attuning to each other almost as in a dance — in any case I have the intuition that it could move toward that… toward even more slowness too…
This massage passed through me powerfully. It was very touching. I still feel very moved. I had spoken to you of the impression of being on a cruise: it was truly linked to this sensation that there was a movement — like a watercourse — that I could join in complete serenity, without risk of being swept away by it.
See you soon… thank you…
A few months ago, I wrote a letter to fear — today I write it to love, to encounters, to the path, to inner peace, to life…
I believe I have waited for your arms all my life — these innocent and loving arms, this sensation of being at home, of having returned to the very essence of who I am: innocent of everything, guilty of nothing.
I lost the sense of time — a subtle magic slipped between us to build a bridge.
I believe the walls in place have yielded. For years I felt like a broken music box — and I slowly came to life, was revived, to the rhythm of your touch, your caresses, your gentleness. The resistances showed themselves in order to be released. Everything was perfectly orchestrated.
Today, what I honour is my body — this powerful ally that helped me overcome everything, that showed me the way when I was lost, that vibrated when I believed the journey was over. My God, I stand before you and I bow to you, my sweet power. Every particle of you reminds me that I am alive.
And finally I thank you — you — for this alchemical dance, this symbiosis of the instant, of the present moment. You who gave me this love without detour, this gift without expectation in return.
A moment suspended and engraved. You are henceforth part of the therapists who have passed through my life.
A heartfelt thank you to you, Bruno. I embrace you.