Your first tantric massage session —
what to expect.
Taking the step towards a first tantric massage session is often a long hesitation before a phone call. Sometimes weeks. A tab you open, then close. This hesitation — I recognise it. It tells me something about you before we have even spoken.
It tells me that you are taking seriously what you are about to do. That you are not coming lightly. That is a good thing. This article is here to answer your questions — the ones you dare to ask and the ones you have not yet found the words for. Plainly, without formula.
In this article
- First contact — before the session
- The welcome — creating the space
- The massage — an inner journey
- What you might feel
- Nudity — and the question you might not dare to ask
- Sexual energy — what it really is
- The question of a woman being massaged by a man
- The question of a man being massaged by a man
- FAQ — your questions, my answers
First contact — before the session
Before we meet, we talk. By phone or by message — whichever you prefer. This preliminary exchange is not a formality: it is a step in its own right.
You tell me who you are, what brings you here, what you are looking for — or what you do not yet know. I explain how I work, the framework within which I operate, what a session with me is and is not. We talk about your apprehensions if there are any, your boundaries, your relationship with touch.
No question is out of place here. Transparency is the foundation of everything else.
For a first free and no-commitment exchange.
Get in touch →The welcome — creating the space
On the day of the session, everything begins before the massage. From the moment you arrive — in Paris, in Ajaccio, or at your home if you prefer — I take the time to let you settle.
Soft lighting, gentle music, a comfortable temperature, an essential oil in the air. Over a herbal tea, we pick up the thread of what we discussed. Your state of mind in that moment, your expectations, any last-minute questions. We establish the safety framework together — that mutual commitment to non-sexual conduct which allows each of us to be fully present, without any second thoughts.
You remain in control of your experience from beginning to end. The right to stop is absolute.
The massage — an inner journey
You settle onto the futon. You undress according to what feels right for you — some people keep their underwear on during a first session, and this is perfectly respected.
The session often begins with a time of conscious breathing — to slow down, to step out of the mind, to descend into the body. Then comes the massage.
The movements are slow. Very slow. It is this slowness that creates everything — it guides each gesture, allows the body to anticipate, to surrender gradually. The back first, then everything else — no part of the body is neglected. Energy flows, releases. There is no goal, nothing other than bringing you into connection with your own body.
A session lasts between 3 and 4 hours in total — the exchange beforehand, the massage, and integration afterwards. This time is non-negotiable: it is what allows depth.
| Stage | Duration | Description |
|---|---|---|
| Welcome and exchange | 60 min | Arrival, settling in, sharing your expectations and questions |
| Preparation | 10 min | Setting up, undressing, settling onto the futon |
| Breathing and meditation | 10-15 min | Recentring, connecting with the body, slowing the mind |
| Body massage | 90-120 min | Full body practice |
| Return and integration | 10-15 min | Return to ordinary awareness, sharing sensations |
| Total duration | 3h to 4h | Complete experience including all necessary time |
What you might feel
There is no right or wrong way to experience a session.
Some people fall asleep. Others remain fully awake, attentive to every sensation. Some cry without knowing why — tears that release something old. Others laugh. Others pass through a zone of discomfort before reaching a deep letting go.
After the session, the effects often last for several days. Deeper sleep, a finer presence to oneself, creativity returning, a new sense of visibility settling in. Sometimes emotions that continue to surface — a sign that something is still at work. If that is the case, you can contact me. Post-session follow-up is part of the support I offer.
Nudity — and the question you might not always dare to ask
Nudity in tantric massage is not a prerequisite. It is a possibility — one you choose or not, according to what feels right for you in that moment.
If I remain clothed during the session, it is a deliberate choice. It says something about the nature of what we are doing together — an asymmetric relationship, in which you receive, and I am in service of your experience.
The approach to the body in tantric massage is holistic. No area is isolated from the others, none is taboo — because your body is a coherent whole, not an assembly of parts of which some would be acceptable and others not. If I remain clothed during the session, it is a deliberate choice. It says something about the nature of what we are doing together — an asymmetric relationship, in which you receive, and I am in service of your experience.
Sexual energy — what it really is
This is often the question that remains unspoken, the one you do not dare to ask openly. So I ask it myself: is tantric massage sexual?
No. And yes, in a certain sense — if by « sexual » one means working with sexual energy. But not in the sense our society usually gives to the word.
The Western view has confined sexual energy to a small space — that of performance, of the act, of outcome. Tantra sees it differently: as an energy of life, of creation, of connection. The same energy that makes plants grow, that makes the heart beat, that brings an idea into being.
In the massage, this energy is approached like any other — with respect, with attention, without goal. It may awaken, circulate, surprise. This is not a problem. It is often a sign that something is releasing.
The question of a woman being massaged by a man
I am the father of two grown daughters, both deeply engaged in thinking about gender relations. This context is not insignificant — it says something about the way I look at women, about the attention I give to what they go through in a world that is not always kind to them.
In the space of the massage, injunctions are left at the door. The inherent fear is stilled. There is no outcome, no expressed expectation — I am not guiding you anywhere. I accompany you into this vast field of possibilities, wherever your energy of the moment carries you.
For many women, this is a rare experience: to be touched by a man, without there being behind that touch an expectation, a goal, a desire to be satisfied. Just presence. Just being welcomed.
The question of a man being massaged by a man
I place this within an almost political dimension.
A man touched in his heart and body by another man cannot help but see life differently. Stepping away from the paths along which everything has conspired to lead him — with their procession of codes, expected behaviours, fears towards the other. A man who is touched opens himself to life, to brotherhood. To something greater.
I do not ask you to place yourself on the spectrum of gender identity or sexual orientation. Because, objectively, it has no importance here. What matters to me is who you are as a human being — and what you connect with in this space.
Your questions, my answers.
No. This confusion persists due to certain distortions on the internet. Authentic tantric massage is a therapeutic and spiritual practice. A sensual dimension exists — the whole body may be massaged — but the intention is radically different. You receive, simply, within a fully secure and ethical framework.
You undress according to your level of comfort. During a first session, some people prefer to keep their underwear on — this is perfectly respected. Nothing is ever imposed.
Between 3 and 4 hours in total — the preliminary exchange, the massage, and integration. This time may seem long. It is necessary. It is what allows depth, letting go, and a gentle return to oneself before resuming the thread of daily life.
By phone or by message — whichever suits you. We talk about you, about what brings you here, your questions and apprehensions. No question is out of place. Things are often much simpler than they appear from the other side of the threshold.
It is the mutual commitment to non-sexual conduct, established at the beginning of the session. It states clearly what the session is and is not — so that each person can engage freely, without second thoughts. Before any massage, I send you a code of good practice which I ask you to sign and return.
I cannot tell you — and that is perhaps the most honest answer I can give. Every session is unique, every body responds in its own way. Warmth, shivers, lightness, emotions rising, laughter, tears, sometimes a single deep calm — everything is possible, and everything is right. There is no correct way to experience a session.
Yes. I remain available in the days that follow if unexpected emotions arise — which sometimes happens, a sign that the body is still at work. A simple message or call is enough. The massage does not end when the session does.
Both share the same foundations — reconnection to oneself, a holistic approach to the body — but differ in the respective positions of the masseur and the person being massaged. The tao works at a distance; the Kashmiri involves a greater closeness between the two bodies.
None. The only prerequisite is an openness to the experience — and the willingness to truly meet yourself, in your shadows as well as your light. The rest comes naturally.
In Paris, in Ajaccio, or at your home — I travel anywhere in France on request. Whatever the location, I take the time to create a conducive space before you arrive. The setting is part of the care.
The fee is fixed — independent of the exact duration of the session, because the time and energy I bring to it are the same in every case.
No — and I do not present it as such. It is not a medical or psychotherapeutic act. But it often works in complementarity with an existing process — where therapy dialogues with the mind, tantric massage addresses the body directly, the sensations, that somatic intelligence which precedes words. There can therefore be, where appropriate, complementarity and dialogue between your psychotherapy sessions and your massage sessions.
Skin infections, acute inflammatory states, fever, certain unaccompanied psychological traumas (and I invite you, through my listening, to be as sincere as possible on this point) — we discuss these during the first exchange. In case of doubt, I am extremely cautious during the massage. Safety comes first.
Testimonials are on the site — written freely, a few days after the session. Each one is different. Some speak of deep relaxation, others of emotional release, others still of reconciliation with their body.
Call me.
A first phone call is free and without commitment. Things are often much simpler than they appear from the other side of the threshold.
All massages are governed by a code of good practice, shared before every session. Your safety and the respect of your integrity come before everything else.
Read the code of good practice →